Willing Doormats

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’ But I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also.” (Mt 5:38-40)

This verse can easily spark debate in Christian circles.  Jesus would go on to talk about giving people more than they ask for, sharing all that you have with them, all while never asking for anything in return.  Whenever these verses come up, (as a quick Google search will confirm), there is an almost immediate cry of, “But don’t be a doormat!  Christians don’t have to let people walk all over them!”

My thoughts are this:  Should we let people do this?  No. 

But should we willingly choose to take abuse, give when we are asked, and go above and beyond for others?

I think the answer for the Christian can only be “yes.” 

Jesus was certainly no doormat.  He had no issue with speaking His mind, throwing money-changers out of the Temple, calling out religious hypocrisy, or declaring unpopular truths.  He was strong and confidant, to say the least. 

And yet, Jesus took abuse that He didn’t deserve without retaliation, He gave to all who asked of Him, He served continually without complaint, and then, of course, He literally laid down His life for others.  As He was being arrested, His disciples attempted to defend Him, coming to His aid with violent intent.  Jesus had this to say:

“Put your sword back in its place,” Jesus said to him, “for all who draw the sword will die by the sword.  Do you think I cannot call on my Father, and he will at once put at my disposal more than twelve legions of angels?  But how then would the Scriptures be fulfilled that say it must happen in this way?” (Mt 26:52-54)

Is Christ acting as a classic “doormat” here, letting others take what they wanted without standing up for Himself or defending Himself? 

Well, yes.  Of course.  It is the essence of the Cross.

But He was no doormat.  The title of this entry is therefore a bit misleading.  A “doormat” is someone who lets people walk all over them and take from them because they lack the backbone to do otherwise.  A Christ-follower is one who, secure in themselves and their God, knows how to take a punch without retaliation, who serves others even when they get nothing back, who can lay their own preferences aside in order to bless others, and who does all of this peacefully, without expectation and without grumbling, because they follow a Saviour who laid down His life for others. 

A doormat lets others have their way, in the name of fear or insecurity.  A Christ-follower chooses to give others their way, in the name of love. 

There is something so Christ-like in taking a hit (physical, verbal, or otherwise) and simply taking it (see 1Pe 2:19-21).  There is something so Christ-like in giving far more than is asked of you, not because you can’t say no, but because you know you can be a blessing.  There is something so Christ-like in letting others have their way, all in the name of loving them, because you are strong enough and secure enough to know who you are. 

The difference is in the intention.  We should not let people take from us – but only because we are too busy giving freely!